Air Keruh

Jangan buang air yang keruh,
Jangan juga ambil yang jernih.
Penghujung masa ini tiada yang utuh,
Yang awalnya tulus, tiada juga yang bersih.

Lebih elok air ditadah,
Lebih jernih bila ditapis,
Biar keruh tapi tiada padah,
Biar di titik madu sehingga manis.

His Universe

If you find him lost,
Do not send the way home,
Ask what is he searching.

If you find him saddened,
Do not ask the reason,
Paint laughter across his lips.

If you find him broken,
Do not piece the shards,
Help build a stronger shell instead.

If you find him poisoned,
Do not find the cure,
Draw it out of his blood.

And you will be his Universe.

Mass Hysteria

Used to wonder how mass hysteria can easily happen to girls (and sometimes women too). Female dormitory are famous for it.

Recently I witnessed how easily influenced they are by another girl/woman with intention to sway opinion. With selected words and a little drama, a group of people that were once your strong supporter are now your enemy - repeating the accusations word by word like a parrot (or sheep).

Mass hysteria - it's about how easily girls/women to fall victim of their own mind and emotion - and many more other weaknesses/lust/nafsu.

I wonder no more.

Neglecting Sorrow

Neglecting Sorrow
For the sake of Joy

Ignoring Hope
For the healing of Longing

Restraining Action
For fear of Reaction

Liberating Loss
For the chance of Gain

Unless, it worth all of the pain

Good night, Good day

And she fell asleep
Amidst memory of giggles
And she probably dreaming deep
In heap of fantasy and fable

Good night.

And she wakes up groggy
Halfway dreaming of bliss
Thinking it was her reality
To be woken up by a kiss

Good day.

And it is a gift
A worthwhile belief
To trust the elusive bliss
To wake up with a real kiss

Kalau Boleh

Kalau boleh aku padamkan...
Tentang raut kasih, senyum, dan tawa,
Tentang harum rambut, kulit, dan nama,
Tentang halus sentuh, belai, dan jiwa.

Kalau boleh....
Pejamkan lah hati dan naluri,
Gelapkan lah bayang dan mimpi,
Hambarkan lah rasa dan cita-cita.

Kalau boleh...
Biar bayangan sesat dari diri,
Biar ingatan terkubur dari mimpi,
Biar rasa kelam dari hati.

Kalau boleh... cuma untuk malam ini.

:: Oji Hamidin ::

Mirrors On The Wall

Mirrors on the wall
Saw your face and we lock eyes
You talk and laughs, I smile and sighs
Many faces and voices, but we do lock eyes.

Mirrors on the wall
Stand apart not too far away
You can't make a move, I need to stay
Many chances and misses, but we never look away.

Mirrors on the wall
The time has come for the partings
You can't say goodbye, I can't tell my wanting
Many hopes and wishes, but our eyes still locking.

Mirrors on the wall
Lay clear but empty, for quite awhile
I stand apart, reflecting memories of your smile
Many days and weeks, in solitude time pass-by

Mirrors on the wall
Still empty, still waiting, for us to lock eyes again.

:: Oji Hamidin ::
26 Dec 2014

:: Oji Hamidin ::

Corak III

Aku mengorak langkah dalam kabus
Cuba melerai kusut, menyambung maksud
Sudah bertimbun sangka, rasa dan luka
Yang terlerai hanya Percaya dari diri

Aku kaku terpaku didepan mimpi
Yang semalam terasa abadi
Terhembus doa, terkelip mata hati,
Untuk terus ada rasa, dan mungkin bermimpi

Gadis kelmarin menyapa sepi
"Kau mencari apa di sini?"
"Tak usah lah kau tercari lagi"
"Tiada hati di rumah Dusta ini"

"Pergi lah, jauh kan diri, Si Pengemis Hati"
Pemilik bertopeng, dah mati dihati
Dia terjerat, terpaku diri, buta di hati
Tiada mimpi, tiada janji, tiada erti

Padam kan lah corak indah ini.

// 26 Dec 2014

:: Oji Hamidin ::

Lifetime of Bliss

I drowned when I look deep in your eyes
Pulled ever so deeply into a perfect dream

I gasped when I touch your lips
Breathlessly locked in your desire

I melt when I behold your heart
Seared completely by a promised bliss

I am humbled when I embrace your serenity
Held captive, prisoner of your unwavering purity

You are Perfection
You are Purity
You are Desire
You are Bliss

So I'm down on my bended knees
Bearing naked every fibre my soul
So I held up my hands to the heaven
Surrendering my fate and destiny

For a chance of an eternal kiss
For a lifetime of your bliss

Avatar: The Future Device

In the near future, I imagine mobile phones will be like PC - a DIY customizable gadget that replaces the need to buy certain model from certain maker. You can pick and choose what to put in the system according to your needs and budget. CPU, RAM, storage size, screen size, camera, gfx engine, modular casing, and finally OS of your choice.

Zoom further into the future, I also imagine the phone/device being integrated with the whole living space. Imagine a wall painted with nanobot paint that is reactive. Project your vacation video on the wall. Even playback the scenery onto the windows to change the outside view to that of your vacation.

A video call can be made and received all over the walls, mirror, etc. Closet door can project your image with a preview of clothes option you wanted to wear (onto your mapped avatar), all the while a friend can comment, suggest, annotate. Even upload their inventory to your closet for your previewing.

Electrical appliances also get connected with your phone/device. The fridge could warn you of your calory intake - by proactively consulting your Health app and remind you of how good you look if you loose a few kg. The fridge can portray the thinner you by accessing countless photos of you from the cloud storage.

Let's call this device Avatar.

With Avatar in your pocket (or palm, integrated on a glove-like wearables), the room's wall can light up to illuminate you. The ceiling has no light fixtures too, since the nano-paint can act as light panels. It can even sync with whatever you are viewing on the Avatar. Say you are browsing photos of your last vacation, the ceiling will use it's Skylight system to light the room as in the photo. With sound.

And since the whole living space is reactive & proactive,  you can never lose an item anymore - you can simply say "Avatar, locate my wallet" and a beacon and wayfinder arrows lights up on the floor/walls.

The Avatar can also act as security device. Its an IDer. Use to unlock door, start car engine, login to the virtual world. What if the device is stolen you say? No problem, it'll be of no use to others. It records your behaviour pattern - voice, body language, touches/tactile behaviour, heart rate and other bodily monitoring to identify it is YOU carrying the device. So no more movie scene of cutting one's thumb or eyeball to open a sealed door. By the way, on topic of security, the whole house can act as security camera, alarm, and witness in court.

Another area of interest is the emergence of 3D printers. Currently it is coarse and simplistic. In the future these machines can replicate a lot more things with a lot more precicion and using all sort of materials - not just plastic. This will make buying physical devices obsolete. So, companies like Samsung, etc won't be selling physical devices anymore. They will sell downloadable schematic. Software recipe to cook your device out of the 3D printers.

Central to all these, ofcourse, will be your Avatar  device, where your money also resides. The downloaded and printed Samsung Pasta Maker 3000 will only turn on if you are there physically.

In this future world, robbery and theft are petty and stupid. You can't benefit from stealing other's 'ID-locked' properties. But the most heinous act would be identity stealing. Digitally scanned personality of you. Uploaded and multiplied on the cloud storage and downloaded to perpetrator's Avatar. You will have multiple twins, probably called X-Avatar025.

Hackers would be king.

Posted via Blogaway

The Laughter

It was the laugh.

Her unguarded, free-spirited laughs that brought me back to the memories of her. When she laughed, I can see it in her eyes, in her frantic gestures. Unabashed laughters. Like the world only exist between us. Like I’ve accidentally made her world brighter, happier, and worth all the pains and sufferings we’ve gone through.

It doesn’t matter the jokes were on me, on others, or in no particular things. She would still laugh that honest laugh… with me, together. That, made it worth fighting for the next dreary days.

It was her laughter. A fraction of time where joy really did exists. Now only a fraction of memories - when she laughed.

A Saviour

Hi, my name is Fauzi Hamidin and I’m a Saviour.

Before you judge, hear me out. It is not a proud statement or a brag. Quite the opposite actually. A saviour has this strong urge to help people. Most of the time at the expense of themselves. One would sacrifice not only time, but a lot of energy, emotion, and his own Self. Yes, it is a good thing to do you’d say, my dear reader, but being a saviour for too long has it’s toll. And I’m beginning to feel the effect. Losing pieces of myself, bit by bit, throughout all the battles I involved myself in. Psychologically, emotionally, and other worldly matter.

A saviour craves appreciation more than anything. Sincere appreciation. We didn’t do these things for recognition or fame. Just an appreciation. It is somewhat a necessity to supplement our own psychological and emotional lackings. Much like compassion or charity. It feeds our soul. Like a hunger decease. Craving to pull someone out of a deep hole so that we can have a companion in our own hole.

But it has it’s pitfalls too. When at the end of the deed no appreciation given, that would chip a small part of you away. Not that we’d expect a return. But we are only human with emotions. Worse if the person you’re trying to save is the one you love. It gets very personal. And it took a large chunk out of you when appreciation was not felt in return. Worser still when you were betrayed by the same person you’re trying to save.

But you know what, dear reader? Worst of it all, at the end of a breaking, the one you loved and try to save, say “You never saved me…” – that dissolves us from being what we are – a Saviour.

PS: Even with all these, I can’t stop being a Saviour. Like a moth to a candlelight. Bittersweet fate isn’t it?

Single & Facing Doomsday

 



21st December 2012.
Mayan’s prophecy of the end of the world. I don’t think it is the end of the world, but more like the end of an Age cycle. Read more here.

But, in my certain morbid way, let’s just say it was true and a giant comet is on it’s way to collide with Earth. It then poses a serious question: When it happen, who you want to be with? Is it better to face it being single and alone? I think it is a blessing to face it as a single. I THINK. Let’s talk about this more…

Let’s put on a Couple scenario:
You and your lover/spouse heard the news on the radio. Fear and panic arises. Both of you hugged & kissed to console each other. Then realization came – “When it happens, I want to be with my family and people I love & care”. Okay now, you love & care for each other, so both should be together when it happen. Ofcourse. But each of you wanted to be with your parents too. So its either you split or try to get everyone (both sides) together. Which is not very logistically realistic. Because your other siblings AND their spouses also wanted to bring everyone under the same roof.

So everyone decided to split or stay – a very hard decision to make. A decision which invariably would left someone not having their wish to be with important people they’d end their life with. Mothers to daughters for example.

Now, a Single scenario:
Heard the news, panicked, scared shitless, and probably broke down in tears thinking of your miserably lonely life will end soon – which probably arguably better, in a sense. After recovery, you’d pack your bag and went back to your parent’s home.

But then again, along the journey back home, you’d think “isn’t it nice to have somebody to share my fears, loneliness, hopes & dreams?” While everything go up in flame and blinding light, isn’t it nice to gaze upon a face that kisses you for the Love shared? A face that says “I’m glad I shared my Life with you”.

Damn it… I think the Single ones are more fucked up now. Oh well, luckily there is (less than) a month to find yourself somebody.

And hopefully fall in love.

:: Oji | 24 Nov 2012 ::


Carpenters - The End Of The World
http://youtu.be/Wm17jKf5G9A

Browsing Your Life

While browsing through your life
I saw your vibrant and sweet youth
Sparkling sweetness and soft tenderness
And I felt a twinge of what I have lost

While browsing through your life
I saw fine lines of maturity forming
Tender sensuality and radiant beauty
And I felt a nudge of what I have missed

While browsing through your life
I saw the toll of age and sadness
Yet still as bright as stars, beauty persevered
And I felt regret of how it could’ve been

Living toward the end of Life with you.

Seeking A Friend For The End Of The World

Last night there was a blackout in my area. It was a big one. All lights went out. I mean it seem like whole town was out. I was plunged into total darkness and all around felt quieter. All around felt… dead. Even my cellphone connection was out too.

The blackout took quite a while and its taking an effect on me. Sitting by a small table with a few lit candles, I felt a tinge of sadness, loneliness, and a little doomy. It remind me of a movie ‘Seeking a friend for the end of the world’. Excellent movie by the way. The last scene was about an impending meteor crash that will end the world. The last few minutes portrays how two lost people, met toward the ending of the world, bonded in journey, and fell in love – only to have less than couple of hours to enjoy the newfound connection. This couple endures the Ending together. While in a blackout, surrounded by lit candles. It was doomy.

Given my circumstances, I felt deeply connected with that movie. Only that I was alone. Felt utterly alone. While in a blackout, surrounded by lit candles.

It was doomy.

Found None

Tonight I tried to write it all down
About emotions that leeched my life away
Tonight I tried to lay it all down
About wishes undone, and dreams gone astray

Tonight I tried to coax myself to express
In a bid to empty this wrecked self for solace
Tonight I tried to ignite this deadness
To burn away the cold fingers of loneliness

I found none.


:: Oji | 17 Nov 2012 ::

Repost: Cyborg 2

Original post on 29 Aug 2007

Future Beware: The Soul Is In The Software

It was Saturday 2 am or so. need to take a break from work and grab some bite while channel surfing Astro - nothing interesting, been channel surfing 2-3 rounds and was about to continue working when...BZZZTTTTTTTT a cyberpunk-ish movie was playing on one of the movie channel.

Dark brooding world, dirty weirdos around...and graffiti all over the buildings - a cyberpunk movie all right i squeal!! it looked 90-ish...Info button > Cyborg 2

oh man i was wishing for this! and....wait...is that Angelina Jolie?!!?! oh my GOD! i almost forgot about this movie! *second squeal for Ms.Jolie*. She was not well known back then, and this hot cyborg has been haunting my 90s cyberdreams ever since. anyway...

      

Cyborg 2....bearing little connection to the 1st movie Cyborg, is a much darker, grittier cyberpunk movie of early 90's. the first was good enough (minus Van Damned), this 'sequel' was awesome! it didn't get much attention since the 90s is all about candy-coloured high school movies, but it was a godsend to me since Blade Runner. With tagline like "Future Beware: The Soul Is In The Software", nothing could go wrong!

If you're into cyberpunk, post-apocalypse movie, give this all-time classic a go. Forget about Terminator movies, it is like a sell-out punk band to my eyes. Plus you could see Ms.Jolie young boobies in all it's glory (DVD/VHS uncut). Yeay!

The original Cyborg

---

Electronica.MY

I created something for Malaysian Electronica @ SoundCloud

Electronica.MY

This group aimed to collect and gather Malaysian electronica artists & producers. To share tracks and ideas. To build a support community of like-minded people and passion. Any genre with Electronica substance are welcome.

   Electronica.MY

Render of the Month – May 2010

Pinkzilla The Terrorizer

:: info ::
2440 x 1555
3ds Max 2010 | Mentalray | Photoshop CS4

A Letter

Today I received a letter
Pink and fragrantly prepared
Softly written twisting elegance
Weaved with dreams, promises, and heart's intent.

It ended with a fiery red lipstick
Kissed deeply. Without name.
And I just said, "It may be addressed wrongly"
For there is no dreams, promises, or faith here.


B.Melayu here